I'm a College GRAD!!!

I'm officially smarter than I was five years ago and finally an honor graduate! I would love to say that I feel completely different, but I don't. It feels GREAT to be done with school, and I do feel like I achieved an amazing accomplishment! I'm quite proud of myself and I'm so grateful to all of my family for pushing me to finish when I didn't think that I wanted to. It's an awesome feeling to know that if and when I decide to use my degree I CAN! Plus I can always rub it in that I was the FIRST of my siblings to get a bachelors degree. (Only by 10 hours cuz Diana got hers at 6:00 Friday night). Friday morning at 8:00 was the big day and I was so nauseated. DJ got up and made me pancakes and said Happy Graduation Day when I got up, but I took 2 bites and felt like throwing up. I get incredibly nervous about things like this and no matter how much I tried to calm myself I just wanted to blow off graduation. 5 minutes before we were were ready to walk out, I wanted to turn around, leave the building and get outta there cuz it didn't seem worth it. I'm telling y'all I have such anxiety. Luckily I had found a couple friends and stood with them and that helped a little bit. Even after we were seated in the Events Center, I still wanted to get up and leave. When they started saying how we couldn't have done this without family and friends, all I could think about was mama in surgery but how she's so proud of me. If I wouldn't have walked, she'd a killed me. (Wouldn't wanted to have dealt with that wrath when she gets better)! After the whole thing, I was really glad that I went through with it. It was a good experience.

My lifesavers Bethany and Cynthia (seriously)

Update on Mama

So Friday morning they did the surgery to remove the tumor and it took 7 hours. They were able to remove 98% of it because the rest was in some blood vessels that were in her spinal cavity. It's the kind of tumor that could take 20 years to get to how this one was. So a decision she has to make a little later is whether to do chemo and radiation to get the rest or let it stay. She is still in a lot of pain and still struggling to communicate. When she does communicate it can be very inappropriate things. She was trying to put some lip balm on her lips and instead started eating it. Just hearing this really broke my heart. I knew this was really serious, but last week I was trying to keep busy so I wouldn't get so upset about it. If you know my mama, she's such a strong and vivacious woman so it's really hard to imagine her this way. I'm flying home on the 12 to stay for 3 weeks and help around the house and do whatever she needs me to. Today she still has no strength, and we're not sure when she'll be able to go home. One of mama and daddy's favorite things is to dance, and this morning she told daddy she wanted to dance. He said you do, and she said yeah. Then he said ok let's dance and she just smiled. It's the worst thing to not be able to help and to think of her being this way. I'm staying positive and knowing that these things can change a in a few days. I really can't wait to be with my family.

What a weekend

How fast everything can change so quickly! After all the complications that my mom has had with her foot the past 6 months, now we have some different problems to deal with. Saturday I was talking with her and she kept forgetting things. She would start a sentence and then just forget. I could tell it was super frustrating for her and it was making me really nervous but I didn't let her know that. I called Diana and asked if she would call her and see what she thought. 5 minutes later she called and said there was definitely something wrong. She called daddy and told him to get her to the er. They did some tests and to make a long story short, she has a tumor that's an inch and a half by two on the left side of her brain. That's what was causing her to forget and to start scribbling when she was trying to write. She's going up to a neurologist today at Emery hospital in Atlanta and seeing what they can do to get rid of it. I'm doing ok, just trying to process it all and figure out whether to fly home or not. If I do decide to go it'll have to be next week because if I don't walk for graduation on Friday, she'd be extremely upset. It's so hard to be here and not there to help with everything. She's my BEST friend and I feel so helpless for her. I'll keep everyone updated when I know more.

Also on Saturday DJ's stepsister Whitney had to have an emergency c-section for her baby Payton. She was two months early and weighed 3 lbs 15 oz. We went to visit them yesterday and they're both doing well. Payton is so beautiful and she's breathing on her own now. When we got to see her, she was on her tummy all curled up and making the cutest faces. I can't begin to imagine what this is like for Whitney and Craig, but my heart goes out to them.

Spring Pics

All time favorite of Daddy Daughter



She's ok with playing in the grass, but she wasn't too sure about being in the flowers.


This is Krista's son Colten. When we first started hanging out with them, Colten would give her hugs and kisses and Addie was not so much into it. She would cry and really want him out of her space. Now she's getting used to it which is really awesome considering how it started out. When we were at the park with them, we were sitting at a picnic table across from each other and Colten came crawling to get Addie. He grabbed the hair on top of her head and pulled her head to the side and opened his mouth and gave her a BIG kiss. It was hilarious! Hmmm...wonder where he learned that?!

Rejuvenated!!

So my sister is a lifesaver!! She offered to let me go to her house in St. George for a week so I could get a break, and it was definitely what I needed. DJ wasn't happy about the idea at first, but quickly warmed to the idea and said I should do it. It was so nice to be in warm weather and be able to spend time with both of our families. Diana and I watched Twilight 3 times and watched some of the outtakes one night. She's addicted now! It's amazing how Edward Cullen can have such an effect on people. :) Her two kids Brianna and Lane were GREAT helpers for me with Addie. They wanted to play with her and give her baths. In fact, one night Lane was helping with a bath and he said, "Aunt Hevr, why does Addie have so many muscles (as he's pointing up his arm at all the places she has fat rolls)?" I cracked up. Then we were out to eat at Don Pedro's and Diana suggested that Addie might be thirsty after eating so I tried to give her some water from my straw and she didn't like it. Then Brianna said I should try some of her pink lemonade, didn't like that either. Lane wanted her to try some of his sprite so I said sure. She LOVED it. The first night I was there Brianna came in and saw me trying to put Addie to sleep, and saw that I was humming songs to her. Brianna quickly left the room and brought back her music box, and said that I could leave it open so the music could play for her. These kids amaze me at how smart they are!! The kids and I made home made oreos one night and they took them for a snack the next day for lunch. Brianna told me that the other kids at school were trading her food for just a piece of the oreo. It was so funny to hear her telling me this.

We went to the park with Angie and her kids, and Addie couldn't stay away from the oranges

Angie makes the BEST home made pizza and the night she was making it for us, Quincy, Daisy and Nash decided to have fun in the flour! It was funny at first



Finding all sorts of things in the grass

Brianna & Lane

If Addie got fussy, Brianna would lay themselves down and then she'd be fine

Braxton reading to Addie (a few weeks ago)

DJ tickling Addie

My nephew Darin bull fighting. He's the one running around in the red socks getting the bull to follow him. It's so much fun to watch. It's very intimidating to be outside the ring when those bulls come so close, so I can't imagine being chased!

We went to the Mexican market on Saturday for some great deals and discovered that they have green tomatoes! Boy did that make my day because I love me some fried green tomatoes!! Also, I found a cake recipe on one of Krista's friend's blog, and it looked like something DJ would love so I decided to try it out. So Saturday night the Jazz were playing and for our snacks I made the Peanut Butter Fudge Cake and fried 3 huge tomatoes. I seriously ate all of the slices except for like 5. The cake was exceptionally yummy and rich too! Yup, that's Reese's Cups on top and they're inside the cake too. The frosting was a 8 oz bar of chocolate melted with cream and peanut butter, oh so sinful!





These ducks just came up in the yard and she was fascinated

Getting over the pitts

A couple days ago was a ROUGH day. Addie was extremely fussy and nothing I did seemed to be good enough for her. Until...I sat down to play the piano which I haven't done in like 2 or so years. She loved it and then came to stand by me to play her on notes. Then after 20 mins she was back to fussy. She was so tired but refused to take a nap. It would help if it would QUIT being so blankety blank cold so we could enjoy being outside. However, it'll be at least another week before that happens. Our trips to the mailbox and Wal-Mart are the highlights of our days. I told DJ I needed a break when he got home so he said he wouldn't go to the gym, and when he got here I could go hang out at the library. I was way excited about that. Then at 5:00 he calls to tell me that the guy he works under invited him to the Jazz game, but he knows I've had a long day so he's willing to come home. As frustrated as it made me at the moment I told him to go because if it were me I know he'd let me go. And he works so hard so why not. I hid my tears til I got off the phone and realized what's a few more hours til she goes to bed. I've felt lately that I'm not being productive enough. Like I should be doing alot more, but I haven't a clue where to start. It would be easier if I had some family within a decent amount of driving distance, and that's what gets me every time. I just don't get how people can stand to live without family. Sometimes I wish we'd never have moved from St. George, but I had to for school. It's a good thing that my brothers and parents are coming in 3 months. I'm counting down the days. It's really comforting to read others' blogs to know that I'm not the only one having a hard time, so thanks to all of you! I can't wait for General Conference this weekend, cuz that will lift me.